RE-TWEET IT!
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The Pain is a living thing.
It lives in the left corner of my lower jaw. Every four hours or so, when the effect of medication wears off, it celebrates its existence with joyous energy.
Just like any newborn, it cares little for my convenience. It wakes me up rudely at 4 a.m., demanding immediate attention with an insistent throbbing beat that mirrors my own heart, or decides to party when I’m in the middle of composing an article, or seeing a patient, or reading a book.
It tires quickly (thank God!) – but even the calm it leaves behind is agonizing for the anticipation of an unwelcome, unexpected return.
Like a tolerant (if helpless) old man may acknowledge the exuberance and enthusiasm of youth, while resenting its blatant reminder of his own past, now lost forever, I mutely suffer the fireworks it sets off inside my mouth… and try desperately to focus on the happier days before it was born, or the soon-to-come afternoon where I hope to have it eliminated.
The Pain was born from a curious constellation of oral epithelium, which left a wisdom tooth lying flat, as if asleep, when all others were standing.
All might have been well if the sleeping tooth stayed that way. But like everything else in nature, it too got restless. Discontent. Unsatisfied.
It wanted, perhaps, a little excitement in its lonely, dark, quiet life. And so it gave birth to The Pain… little knowing what a monster it would become, or that it would bring about its own ruin and destruction.
Without this terrible offspring, I may have ignored the parent completely. Now, I cannot. This problem child is making my very existence a cycle of misery and merciful relief, the latter only brought about by the marvels of modern pharmacology.
And so, both parent and progeny will have to go.
The decision to order termination was easy. Like any assassin knows only too well, the logistics of the process are elaborate. And so I will have to suffer the juvenile’s playful torture for a while longer, hoping my agonized wincing doesn’t insult or annoy someone at a family wedding I’m obliged to attend today.
Wish me luck!
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