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“Give me one moment in time
When I’m all that I thought I could be
When all of my dreams are a heartbeat away…”
I cried last night.
Bitter tears. Of frustration. Pain. And anger.
All the while, words of my favorite Whitney Houston song kept ringing in my mind. A decade and a half of agonizing, tantalizing ‘near success’ had finally taken its toll. For too long, “all of my dreams have been a heartbeat away”.
In my social and business network spanning many thousand people, I have many celebrities, rockstars, le’ elite.
Any ONE of them, with a single email, phone call, recommendation, endorsement or referral, has the potential to COMPLETELY change the course of my work with heart kids and set it on a new, higher trajectory.
I know it – and keep trying to catalyze that magical event. And on many occasions, I’ve come oh-so-close… only to have it all fizzle out.
After a while, that kind of thing takes a heavy toll… because hanging in the balance is the survival and health of hundreds of children with congenital heart defects.
- There’s the famous blogger read by almost 50,000 people who won’t mention CHD awareness on his blog – because other readers may want him to feature their causes!
- There’s the famous Internet marketer, with a reach of almost a million people, who once wanted to hold a special event to raise funds for my charity – but now won’t even answer my emails!
- There’s the social networking guru who promised a big donation to sponsor a child’s heart operation – however, the check never arrived!
- There’s the best-selling author who mentioned adding my non-profit to a list of worthy charities supported by his work – but whose manager never got back to me, or replied to repeated follow ups!
Each of these episodes created a roller-coaster of emotions.
Hope – that something would come of it.
Excitement – that it would grow big, and help hundreds of kids.
Anxiety – when nothing seemed to happen for a while.
Disappointment – when realization hit that it won’t – ever.
And the hard lessons I’ve learned from this repeating cycle are that:
* Actions speak louder than words – don’t rely on a spoken or written promise as much as a tiny action step taken in support
* Celebrities are always concerned about their image, more than the cause they are endorsing or supporting
* Most ‘rockstars’ want something in return for what they do… and that has poisoned my nature and style, as I find myself bending over to accomodate them (Never again!)
* What they do for my charity needs to fit their agenda, whatever it is
As a fundraiser, evangelist for my non-profit, the Dr.Mani Children Heart Foundation, and online networker, I am deeply aware of the reality that charity is NOT compulsory. I realize and respect that each of my donors is acting out of a sense of caring, generosity and compassion for the under-privileged children my organization supports.
And this is NOT about these wonderful people who have been the cornerstone of all that we have achieved until now. $133,000+ raised in donations. 47 children operated successfully. These are accomplishments made possible by the Heart Kids tribe!
I only wish I had been smart enough to realize earlier that they are the ONLY people that matter – and not sought out celebrities and ‘rockstars’, hoping for that ‘quick hit’.
For years, I battled my natural reticence and shyness to thrust myself into the ‘digital limelight’, because I believed as a celebrity I could make a difference – in a bigger way. (Incidentally, MOST of my family and friends don’t even know what I do online!)
And I’m stubborn. Won’t give up easily.
But now I will.
I’ll give up on wanting to be a celebrity.
Because experience taught me that it sucks to be one!
I’ll just focus on doing things behind the scenes. Under the radar. With the support and encouragement of those 739 (and growing) people who really matter.
My Donors
.
The true stars, who make a difference to a heart kid’s life.
Coming to that decision made me happier.
I went to sleep with a smile on my face.
A smile that’s still there this morning.
Growing wider, as I write this post.
Thank you for reading.
And for being a part of the Heart Kids Tribe… where your stereotypical celebrity is NOT welcome – and YOU are the ROCKSTAR!
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{ 10 comments }
Doc
There are people who care and there are people who don’t. Let us act based on the acts of the people who do. And stop bothering about people who commit something and forget that.
You will be so much more peaceful.
Arun
I hear you Dr. Mani…
It seems like I have a resounding “headache”
shouting with “frustration” – “tears” & “joy”
as I read your mind:
——————————————————-
“I’ll give up on wanting to be a celebrity.”
Because experience taught me that it sucks to be one!
——————————————————-
You are choosing to walk “under the radar” leading you
to tread an unfamiliar & often lonely path
“the road less traveled by”.
What more can I say?
Your soul is alive and well!
Sorrow often walks side by side with Wisdom.
I have been thinking a lot this past year
how the “real CELEBRITIES”…
the “small-silent MAJORITY” make a difference
-IF we give them a chance -:
-”women”- using wisely “micro credits”
&
-Those -”at the bottom of the pyramid”- C.K. Prahalad-
Blueprint to dignity and profitability.
I have chosen to “sing” with the “silent ACTIVE majority”…
I want to leave you with these words given to
a young man Joshuah at the gate of the promise land:
“Be strong and of Good Courage, fear not”
FIAT LUX
TEMPUS FUGIT
Joel Bomane from Sunny Sudden France
P.S: $133,000+ donations
- 47 children operations
- 739 support!
Keep smiling:)
Dr. Mani -
Your 4 steps on the emotional roller coaster are very well defined and very familiar to me.
It’s so disappointing to me when people get very excited about a project of mine and then disappear when the rubber meets the road. But it happens all the time… in all aspects of life.
My wife has been putting together a high school reunion for the past 4 months. The committee of 10 very emphatic and excited former students has dwindled to my wife and one other woman who will pull this off. One by one, people fell away.
And some won’t return calls. My opinion is that when that happens, it’s for two reasons – guilt and embarrassment.
Instead of just apologizing and saying stuff happens, it seems easier to trash the relationship.
Too bad.
But also it’s also probably a blessing if it happens up front.
It’s also funny to me how we go after the “rock stars” in every business. Truth is that becoming a rock star is a full time job with little time for anything or anyone else.
Those who create, execute and have an impact on their worlds are the true rock stars.
You, my friend, are one the biggest stars – forget the rocks.
David Perdew
Is one born great, or has one manipulated in a manner such, that greatness has been thrust upon them by others, or is it that greatness is something to achieve.
There are so many things that occur naturally, & man had to find words to describe them.
Celebrity is such a nuance.
To put it simply – is the paparazzi ever interested in Great People.
Shoot – they’ll fail – with their lenses with mould formed – forever.
Napoleon Bonaparte – who shouted at his army at the Pyramids “soldiers, fifty centuries are looking down on you”.
The Naval Admiral (please – I am not sure – but the story goes) who took his armada across the seas & burnt all the ships, leaving no option for his men.
Did they have celeb status – NO – they had greatness.
They were – NATURALLY POWERFUL.
You are one too – who is so.
I will DARE NOT PUT YOU into celeb status.
More over Celebrities – I don’t care for them.
As for me – they are just “puppets on a string”.
They don’t realize that they are standing at the hangman’s podium, all ready, and at any time the man-hole opens, there is a trampoline a few feet below, to boost the effect.
Hey there Dr. Mani,
Boy have I been there a few times myself.
One of my old time favorite “heavy metal” songs – pretty much sums up my feelings on the whole deal – whether it be Rock-n-roll, a corporate job, or Internet Marketing.
“Ridin` down the highway
Goin` to a show
Stop in all the by-ways
Playin` rock `n` roll
Gettin` robbed
Gettin` stoned
Gettin` beat up
Broken boned
Gettin` had
Gettin` took
I tell you folks
It`s harder than it looks
It`s a long way to the top
If you wanna rock `n` roll
If you think it`s easy doin` one night stands
Try playin` in a rock roll band
It`s a long way to the top
If you wanna rock `n` roll
Hotel, motel
Make you wanna cry
Lady do the hard sell
Know the reason why
Gettin` old
Gettin` grey
Gettin` ripped off
Under-paid
Gettin` sold
Second hand
That`s how it goes
Playin` in a band
It`s a long way to the top
If you wanna rock `n` roll”
Such a simple song, with a very annoying “bagpipe solo”
that pretty much says it all. When I was young, that’s what I wanted to do, be a “Rock Star” – no kidding. Build a castle with 45 rooms, I had it all planned out. A friend of mine is STILL at it, (Snake Rock) – was at it before I ever was – has ran with the “rock stars” and he’s had quite a bit of success. He’s in his 50’s now, and every success came at some price. Now he has his own studio, and teaches kids how to play – so the beat goes on.
Me however, after enough “band fights” and all the hard knocks that song states above – decided I had enough. Went on to tend bar for 11 years, till one day I said “there has got to be more to life than this.”
Learned how to work on the computer from a one year tech course – and did the “corporate” thing for about 3 years.
Finally began working from home – learned about IM – and switched gears again. I’m still out on the net, revising, rethinking, re-planning and guess what.
Yep – the song STILL applies.
Hang in there Dr. Mani, you’ve always been awesome to me – therefore I’ll always stand behind you too!
Thanks a bunch!
Michelle
Here’s an interesting aside.
Last night, before going to bed, I queued up an email about
a Product Launch Guide report – and invited readers to donate
$10 to CHD in exchange for getting a copy.
TEN BUCKS for Product Launch Formula???
I woke up to an email inbox full of donations. And EACH of
these donors has done MORE to help a child live than ANY of
those so-called ‘celebrities’ and ‘rockstars’ ever did!
ACTION driven by compassion, purpose and that is heart-felt
beats out EVERYTHING else.
Thank you from my heart for your support.
I so deeply appreciate and respect it.
All success
Dr.Mani
@Arun Agarwal – Good advice. I learned that late. Will follow it hence
@joelbomane – Your mind and mine always resonate! So do our souls.
You’re right – they are the REAL celebrities, unsung yet effective.
I am smiling now
@David Perdew – Thank you for your very kind words, I deeply appreciate
you, too. I guess, in the pursuit of rockstars to help ME, I’ve let
down some people whom I’ve made promises to – including you during the
Niche Widget project launch. Sorry about that. I’ll try harder now
to not let things like that happen – coz it surely hurts someone else
just as badly as it did me.
@dileepa – Nice distinction between celebrity status and GREATNESS.
Thanks for sharing that insight. The hangman’s podium image will be
pretty disturbing for celebrities, too
@Michelle – Love the lyrics. Thanks for sharing that with us, it helps.
Am writing a blog based on another song too which I watched (along with
9 million others) on YouTube this a.m. A ‘must watch’ video about the
power of purpose… this one
Hi Dileepa,
Here’s the original song (where the lyrics came from) – you’ll see what I mean about the bagpipes. Love the song, but the bagpipes kinda kill me (the tone)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1iR2Wi3u5o
Dr. Mani – hope that everything is coming around, and just got a chance to send my donation in to http://www.aweber.com/b/VY5p
One day it will be a whole lot more!
Lotsa love!
Michelle
Incidentally Dr. Mani,
http://ow.ly/2Z6U was awesome!
Thanks!
Michelle
What’s an applause!
What’s an APPLAUSION!
Could it be an ovation??
I mean – a standing ovation —-
MeghnaK – you are in my view.
Here is another:
Shaheen Jafargholi:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVU4IkzMNIo
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